Sunday, August 14, 2011

A dream is a wish my heart makes

Posted by The Queen Bee at Sunday, August 14, 2011

A dear friend's mom passed away early this month and as I entered the door of the funeral chapel, there was a feeling of nostalgia as I was greeted by the scent of flowers that lay beside the coffin. It was like transporting back to almost two years ago when my pillar of strength went to be with our creator.  Like me, my friend lost her mom to a crippling disease.  We both witnessed how painful it is to see the one who gave us life suffer so much before finally breathing their last.  Those who lost a mom like us knows one will never get over that feeling of loss, no one and nothing can fill the void caused by it.

Since mom went away, I have learned to appreciate the value of dreams.  A dream of mom would make me wake up happy the next day.  The feeling of being with her and being able to see her face to face and feel her touch in a dream is priceless since she left.  The thought of her sends an unquenchable thirst of being able to hug her so every night before I fall in deep slumber, I pray that I'd be with her in my dreams so that even for that moment, I will relive the feeling of having that comforting touch and the feeling of security I haven't felt since she left because I only felt safest with you my momma, I miss you so much.

My mom is probably the strongest person I have ever known, I am inspired by her toughness.  She stood tall despite the barrage of tests that came her way from work, her family, relationships and her health.  The greatest display of strength that mom probably made is asking forgiveness from the person who did her wrong, that person that I cannot forgive because even if my mom had long passed away, he continues to oppress her and deprive her of her rights.  As I write this, I am reminded of how my mom set a good example for me as I continue to struggle with this issue on forgiveness but everything is a process and I have just begun to pick up the pieces and deal with it bit by bit.

I know she has never really left because in my dreams, she tells me she knows what I am going through and she constantly reassures me everything will be alright.  Thank you mommy for being my angel both here on earth and from up above. I love you so much.

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jeon on August 17, 2011 at 10:17 PM said...

This is so touching nelle. I was misty-eyed while reading this. Kakaiba.

God bless you always.


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